good one..

The boss of a big company who needed to call one of his employees about
an urgent problem with one of the main computers, dialed the employee's
home phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper, "Hello."

"Is your daddy home?" he asked.

"Yes," whispered the small voice.

"May I talk with him?"

The child whispered, "No."

Surprised, and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your
mommy there?"

"Yes."

"May I talk with her?"

Again the small voice whispered, "No."

Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss
asked, "Is anybody else there?"

"Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman."

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss
asked, "May I speak with the policeman?"

"No, he's busy," whispered the child.

"Busy doing what?"

"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman," came the whispered answer.

Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a
helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is
that noise?"

"A hello-copper" answered the whispering voice.

"What is going on there?" asked the boss, now alarmed.

In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just
landed the hello-copper."

Alarmed, concerned, and even more then just a little frustrated the boss
asked, "What are they searching for?"

Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle: "ME"

Mobile phones - Retail Cost in India

Following are the sites where you can find the market cost of a mobile phone in india (with bill & warranty)

http://www.univercell.in/compare1.asp?mno=17&mno=112&mno=136
http://www.indiagsm.com/

bakwaas!

actually last one is based on an Interesting Isaac Asimov's article. Its
bit long but interesting:

"What is intelligence, anyway? When I was in the army, I received the
kind of aptitude test that all soldiers took and, against a normal of
100, scored 160. No one at the base had ever seen a figure like that,
and for two hours they made a big fuss over me. (It didn't mean
anything. The next day I was still a buck private with KP - kitchen
police - as my highest duty.)

All my life I've been registering scores like that, so that I have the
complacent feeling that I'm highly intelligent, and I expect other
people to think so, too. Actually, though, don't such scores simply mean
that I am very good at answering the type of academic questions that are
considered worthy of answers by people who make up the intelligence
tests--people with intellectual bents similar to mine?

For instance, I had an auto-repair man once, who, on these intelligence
tests, could not possibly have scored more than 80, by my estimate. I
always took it for granted that I was far more intelligent than he was.
Yet, when anything went wrong with my car I hastened to him with it,
watched him anxiously as he explored its vitals, and listened to his
pronouncements as though they were divine oracles--and he always fixed
my car.

Well, then, suppose my auto-repair man devised questions for an
intelligence test. Or suppose a carpenter did, or a farmer, or, indeed,
almost anyone but an academician. By every one of those tests, I'd prove
myself a moron. And, I'd be a moron, too. In a world where I could not
use my academic training and my verbal talents but had to do something
intricate or hard, working with my hands, I would do poorly. My
intelligence, then, is not absolute but is a function of the society I
live in and of the fact that a small subsection of that society has
managed to foist itself on the rest as an arbiter of such matters.

Consider my auto-repair man, again. He had a habit of telling me jokes
whenever he saw me. One time he raised his head from under the
automobile hood to say: "Doc, a deaf-and-mute guy went into a hardware
store to ask for some nails. He put two fingers together on the counter
and made hammering motions with the other hand. The clerk brought him a
hammer. He shook his head and pointed to the two fingers he was
hammering. The clerk brought him nails. He picked out the sizes he
wanted, and left. Well, Doc, the next guy who came in was a blind man.
He wanted scissors. How do you suppose he asked for them?"

Indulgently, I lifted my right hand and made scissoring motions with my
first two fingers. Whereupon my auto-repair man laughed raucously and
said, "Why, you dumb jerk, he used his voice and asked for them." Then
he said smugly, "I've been trying that on all my customers today." "Did
you catch many? I asked. "Quite a few," he said, "but I knew for sure
I'd catch you." "Why is that?" I asked. "Because you're so goddamned
educated, Doc, I knew you couldn't be very smart."

And I have an uneasy feeling he had something there."

Pankaj Maurya wrote:
QUESTIONS FOR ONLY INTELLIGENTS



Below are four (4) questions and a bonus question. You have to answer them
instantly. You can't take your time, answer all of them immediately. OK?

Let's find out just how clever you really are.

Ready? GO!!! (scroll down)

First Question:
You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What
position are you in? (SCROLL DOWN)

Answer: If you answered that you are first, then you are
absolutely wrong! If you overtake the second person and you take his
place, you are second!

Try not to screw up in the next question.

To answer the second question, don't take as much time as you took for the
first question.

Second Question:
If you overtake the last person, then you are...?(SCROLL DOWN)

Answer: If you answered that you are second to last, then you are wrong
again. Tell me, how can you overtake the LAST Person?

You're not very good at this! Are you?

Third Question:
Very tricky math! Note: This must be done in your head only.

Do NOT use paper! and pencil or a calculator. Try it.
Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000. Now add 30. Add another
1000. Now add 20. Now add another 1000
Now add 10. What is the total?

Scroll down for answer.

















Did you get 5000? The correct answer is actually 4100.

Don't believe it? Check with your calculator! Today is definitely not your
day. Maybe you will get the last question right?

Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini,
4. Nono.

What is the name of the fifth daughter? (SCROLL DOWN)

'''''''''''''''













Answer: Nunu?

NO! Of course not. Her name is Mary. Read the question again


Okay, now the bonus round.

There is a mute person who wants to buy a toothbrush. By
imitating the action of brushing one's teeth he successfully
expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is
done.

Now if there is a blind man who wishes to buy a pair of
sunglasses, how should he express himself?



















He just has to open his mouth and ask, so simple.

[School of Junk] Employee of the Year

Jokes 4m MunnaBhai_II

PROFESSOR
Gandhi Jayanti ke baray mein kya jantey ho?
MUNNA BHAI
Gandhi bahut jabardast aadmi tha, Baap. Maa Kasam, par apun ko yeh nehin malum ke yeh Jayanti kaun hai.

CIRCUIT
Bhai, Bapu ne bola tha ke kabhi jhoot nehin bolna mangta hai. Apun aaj se kabhi jhoot nehin bolega Bhai.
MUNNA BHAI
Aye Circuit, woh Sunita ka baap aya hai terayko dund rehla hai.
CIRCUIT
Bhai usko bolo apun gaon gaya hai, kheti karneko.
MUNNA BHAI
Par Circuit, abhi to tu bola kabhi jhoot nehin bolega.
CIRCUIT
Bhai, apun jhoot nehin bolega, par tum to bol sakta hai na.

MAMU
Chand toh raat ko nikalta hai, aaj din mein kaise nikal aya?
GIRL
Ullu to raat ko bolta hai, aaj din mein kaise bol pada?

CIRCUIT
Bhai, woh apnay bachpan ka dost aarehla aaj raat ko dinner pe. Mera sara chain collection apnay kamray mein chupa do na please.
MUNNABHAI
Kyun tera dost chor hai kya?
CIRCUIT
Nehin Bhai, woh apnay chain pechan lega.

MAMU
Bhai, apnay ko char mahinay mein Tamil sikhna padega. Kuch upay batao.
MUNNA BHAI
Tamil kyun, aur char mahinay ka kya chakkar hai?
MAMU
Meinay ek Tamil baccha adopt kiya hai, aur woh char mahinay mein bolne lagay ga.

PROFESSOR
Akal badi ki bhais?
MUNNA BHAI
Bole toh pehlay date of birth bata mamu.

MUNNA BHAI
Circuit, bole toh yeh Ford kya hai?
CIRCUIT
Bhai, gaadi hai.
MUNNA BHAI
Toh phir, yeh Oxford kya hai?
CIRCUIT
Bole toh, simple hai bhai, Ox mane Bael, Ford mane gaadi. Oxford bole toh Baelgaadi.

Circuit takes a flight to Singapore and he is seated next to an Englishman. Circuit open his tiffin and serves himself a roti.
ENGLISHMAN
What is this?
CIRCUIT
Bread India
Circuit then open the box of jalebi.
ENGLISHMAN
What is this?
CIRCUIT
Sweet India
With all the food he hogged on, Munna farts. The Englishman is offended and in shock asks ...
ENGLISHMAN
What is that?
CIRCUIT
Air India

CIRCUIT
Aye Mamu, tereko papad aur jhapad mein pharak pata hai kya?
MAMU
Nehin.
CIRCUIT
To kha ke dekh le, pata chal jayega.

MUNNA BHAI
Mamu, apun bachpan mein dus maley ke building se gir gaya tha.
MAMU
Aarey, phir kya hua. Bach gaya ki tapak gaya?
MUNNA BHAI
Yaad nehin hai yaar. Bahut purane baat hai.

MUNNA BHAI
Mamu, tu kitna pada hai?
MAMU
B.A.
MUNNA BHAI
Sala, two akshar pada aur woh bhi ulta?

MAMU
Oye, maar gayay yaar. Meri biwi aur premika saath saath aa rehla hai.
MAMU KA DOST
Arrey, mein bhi yehi bolnewala tha.

CIRCUIT
Oye Short Circuit yeh light bulb pe baap ka naam kya likh raha hai?
SHORT CIRCUIT
Apun baap ka naam roshan kar rehle hai.

PRINCIPAL
Agar koi ladka girls hostel mein gaya toh first time 100 Rs fine, 2nd time 200 Rs. Fine and 3rd time 500.

MUNNA BHAI

Monthly paas ka kya lega Mamu

 

superb illusion

Good Optical Illusion

http://www.michaelbach.de/ot/col_rapidAfterimage/index.html

p.s. magenta+grey=green??

 

[School of Junk] joke

once himesh reshammiya's father in law went to visit him
he knocked on the door
himesh: kaun hai?
father in law: OHHHHH TERA TERA TERA SASURRRRRRRR

First Post

Hi all,

In this blog i'll publish junk forwards that i recieve on email, etc... By publishing this stuff I dont intend to hurt anyone. Any reasonable objections to the posts will be removed.

-Rajesh